Clinton Township Newsletter

3 M a y 2 0 1 8 Carol Beder's – Julie Fl�nn * "Ten Habits of Mentally Strong People", by Dr. Travis Bradberry. www.linkedin.com/pulse/ten-habits- mentally-strong-people-dr-travis-bradberry/?trk=eml-email_feed_ecosystem_digest_01-recommended_ articles-9-Unknown&midToken=AQGK2kWV732LDg&fromEmail=fromEmail&ut=1pwElz-4sjqEc1 Now Offering: Gift Certificates for Mom! You're not alone when you list with me. I'm with you 24/7. And I live in Clinton Township! www.VickiTuschak.com • vtuschak@yahoo.com office: 908.735.8080 • cell: 908.334.2164 This Is Our Clinton Township! Vicki Tuschak S a le s As s o c i ate THINK SPRING Call Me! Recently I read an interesting article called, "Ten Habits of Mentally Strong People" by Dr. Travis Bradberry. (You can read his article via the link below.) However, with all due respect, I've listed the habits here with my own take on them – as a middle-aged woman, as a mother and as a small business owner. "You have to fight when you already feel defeated." Bradberry's not actually talking about "fighting", of course, but persistence. As a parent I've experienced this many times – especially when our children were small. Often I felt quite exhausted but my kids needed me, so I was there for them: at home, at school, in their sports and activities, and with the dozen or so trips to the ER. They survived, thankfully, and then my oldest child repaid the favor recently by taking ME to the ER. (I fought a tree... and the tree won. That's a story for another column.) "You have to delay gratification." Not my strong suit, but I get it. If the famous Stanford marshmallow test had been given to me as a child, not only would I have eaten my two marshmallows right away, but I might have tried to convince the other kids that it was in their best interest to give me theirs as well. I'm working on it. "You have to make mistakes, look like an idiot, and try again— without even flinching." Ooh, I'm good at this. I make mistakes ALL the time. I then recognize that the mistake was mine and apologize profusely. And then I go and make other mistakes (again, some of which land me in the ER). You've probably noticed several mistakes right in this publication. It keeps us humble... "You have to keep your emotions in check." I come from a long line of Grace Under Pressure/WASP ancestors. Keeping my emotions in check isn't so much a problem – showing my emotions – now that's a different story. "You have to make the calls you're afraid to make." Here Bradberry is talking about making decisions, however as for actual phone calls, one college summer spent at a job in telemarketing taught me to fearlessly talk to anyone on the phone... and, might I add, to withstand repeated verbal abuse on the phone – all the while maintaining my sense of civility and professionalism. I highly recommend every young person try out this gig for a short time. It will definitely give you a thicker skin when cold-calling, and will also give you some empathy when those annoying telemarketers call you incessantly. (I get off the phone with them fast – politely.) "You have to trust your gut." I've learned how to do this over the years, but it isn't easy. Running a business teaches you this quickly – there's no boss to ask questions of and, since I have zero business school training, my gut is all I have to go on. "You have to lead when no one else follows." I learned this as a kid. There were times when I didn't want to play whatever the other kids were playing, I was bullied a bit, or I just wanted to be alone. During one of those instances my mother said, "Julie, in life you need to learn to be your own best friend." Sage advice – it's come in handy many times. "You have to focus on the details even when it makes your mind numb. Oh I always focus on the details. Problem is, sometimes it's the wrong details. I'm working on it. And, yes, sometimes it makes my mind numb. "You have to be kind to people who are rude to you." My Southern upbringing helps mightily with this. "Kind" is my natural default button. Mustering up the gumption to be rude to people who are rude to me is much harder. Living and working in NYC helped. "You have to be accountable for your actions, no matter what" This is a lesson – perhaps the most important one, that life has taught me. It requires the ability to recognize when I've done the wrong thing, admit it and try to change course. Easy to say, hard to do. In this time of political turmoil, uncertainty and divisiveness, let's all make the effort to stay mentally strong and also help each other to do so. Perhaps I'll start by sharing my marshmallows with you... I hope you all have a blessed Mother's Day and a beautiful May – we deserve some Spring!

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