3
D e c e m b e r 2 0 1 7
Call
Susan Hall–
Your
Kind of
Agent!
Clinton Township –
Your Kind of Town!
908.735.8080 Office
908.310.7226 Cell
susanjhall1030@gmail.com
Susan Hall
CRS, GRI, SRES
®
, ASP
™
Broker/Sales Associate
186 Center Street
Suite 150
Clinton, NJ 08809
Carol
Beder's
C
e
l
ebrating
Over
40
Y
ears!
Carol
Beder's
It just keeps getting worse.
Every year the challenges
loom larger when dealing
with recorded messages
and menus on the telephone. I used to make a doctor's appointment by dialing
one number and Judy would answer politely. We'd chat briefly about her kids
and my joints and then set an appointment in the near future to see the Doc.
Days of yore! I now punch in a pre-set number and am greeted with more
menus than there are in all the restaurants in the county. Alexander Graham
Bell never intended his beloved invention to be the instrument from Hell.
• "Thank you for calling Heaven Help Us Health Care. Your call is important
to us. Your call may be recorded for quality assurance. Also, on slow days,
our staff enjoys listening to your interesting complaints. If you wish to see a
physician before January, 2018, please press 9."
• "Welcome to our facility. If you know your party's extension please press it
now. We've recently changed our extensions, so good luck. Let's just proceed
to our game of scheduling an appointment:
• If you wish to pay a bill, please press 2.
• If you wish to argue over a bill, hang up.
• If you need directions to our office, try googling it.
• If you wish to make an appointment, please dial the operator. Waiting time
to speak to a scheduler is approximately 2 hours, 30 minutes. You should live
that long.
• We suggest you dial 911 if you are bleeding profusely or unable to take more
than 3 breaths.
• If you need immediate service please enter your name, date of birth, address,
telephone number, Social Security number and your present and desired weight.
For quicker service, try entering the first four letters of Taylor Swift's
favorite song.
• If you think scheduling a doctor's appointment is mind-boggling, try
contacting any government office: • Press l for Building and Maintenance...
• Press 2 for Consumers Affairs... • Press 3 for Board of Elections...
• Press 4 for Finance Department...
…and so on...
When you finally reach your choice of offices more menus appear in order to
reach your choice of personnel. Then, chances are, he or she will be on coffee
break. Years ago in Westfield we were on a first name basis with the operator.
I enjoyed a party line where I happily spent lazy summer afternoons listening
in to neighbors' conversations. It gave a new meaning to "Whose Line is It".
All this new technology? I went through Menopause in less time.
